Harvard University

At 9:15 PM on September 7, 2013, I was parked alone in my car when the cast list for my final performance of "The Nutcracker" with the <Name of Ballet redacted per author’s request> was posted online. As I scrolled nervously through the PDF, my anxiety came to a head. It took me about five minutes to read the whole thing. When I finally finished it, I didn't know what to think. I had gotten good parts, but for the third year in a row, I hadn't received the lead role of the Sugarplum Fairy, and it made me feel completely lost. I joined the Ballet when I was in fourth grade, late for a dancer,…